I'm not sure exactly how I want to do this blog. Mainly it is for me to get my thoughts out on what is going on around here. Sometimes that isn't the easiest thing living so far away from our families and having my husband in a combat zone. There are a million things flying around in my head so putting them down and getting them out seems like a good idea. I will post about the previous issues we have had in another post. This post is just things that are really on my mind TODAY.
Just a little back information just in case you don't know the family circumstances before reading this:
I suffer from severe food and drug allergies and have limited environmental allergies. I find myself very fortunate because I can restrict the things in my diet so that I don't have any issues. Learning of my allergies later in life made it a little harder I think because there are foods that I really love that were hard to give up- like rice. My husband on the other hand has severe enviromental allergies and gets to the point where his allergy medicine doesn't even work. Hopefully at some point we can be settled enough that the command he is with will refer him out to get allergy shots. We decided to have a baby and prayed that he would be free of the allergies we suffer from. Our son doesn't seem like he has many environmental allergies (at least yet) but he has significant food allergies.
Three days ago I did what a lot of parents do and I gave him a tube of M&Ms thinking it was a harmless act. Kids love chocolate. He isn't an exception. He is 18 months old and the minis are perfect for his little hands. He has been sensitive to sugar so he hardly gets sweets. He has been doing better with it so I figured the M&Ms would be fun for him. Then I noticed he started getting allergic shiners. (For anyone who isn't familiar with the term- it is darkened circles under the eyes that happens when you have eaten or come in to contact with an allergen. It is caused by increased blood flow to the sinuses.) He also had some congestion and knowing how quickly his allergies can move I immediately gave him a dose of benedryl. He had a dose of his Cetirizine later that night and went to bed seeming to be just fine. The next day he also had benedryl and his Cetirizine and I figured it was probably hay fever due to this area's horrible proclivity to kick up all sorts of allergens.
The next morning I woke hearing James fussing but the sound was unusual. I went in to get him and realized he was really glassy eyed and his heart was racing. I put him on my bed and undressed him and realized he was having retractions (where the abdomen sinks below the breast bone showing ribs and extends out very far) and his nose was flaring. I immediately gave him a dose of benedryl, quickly dressed and went to the ER. He had a nebulizer treatment and was released once his oxygen levels started to level out. We had an appointment that evening with his doctor and he prescribed an oral steroid to help open up his lungs. We were instructed to stay at the hospital for an hour after the dose to make sure it was working. An hour later James' condition had become worse and he was once again having signs of respiratory distress. Our doctor decided to admit him and give him nebulizer treatments through the night. He started doing much better and was sent home. During his stay they drew two vials of blood for allergy testing. It was assumed the whole incident was caused by the M&Ms he had eaten over 24 hours before.
Now here we are. We are waiting- pretty impatiently- for the results for the test which the doctor described as being ambiguous due to it's sensitivity. Something is better than nothing. I'd rather know if there is a possible trigger than to go in to this blind. As he gets older and is exposed to more things I know there will come a time when he one of the triggers actually sets off a bad anaphylactic reaction that won't be handled so simply with benedryl. I don't want to see my son intubated or worse.
At the same time all of this was happening my husband was sitting in the middle of Afghanistan pretty oblivious of what was going on. A message had to be sent to his command so that they could give him the news that our son was hospitalized. I know that this was very hard for my husband because he is the type to be right by my side and he is very hands on with our son. We hoped we had figured out what most of his triggers were at this point so we could avoid more interactions with the ER or hospital. This was NOT what we had expected during this deployment.
The last two days I have sat and thought about the scope of all of this. There will have to be lifestyle changes in our home. It isn't safe for us to eat out. Chocolate is one of our favorite things and it is going to disappear from our lives. When we came home from the hospital there was a candy dish sitting on the table full of M&Ms and the entire time I was gone I kept thinking about it as a dish full of the most dangerous little pills that could send our little boy spiraling out of control and back in to the hospital. I have likened the thought of chocolate to rat poison. Not something that I want my son to ever have access to.
Then the reality of life hits. I can't protect him from everything but believe me I will do my best. I can't keep him in a bubble. He will have friends and eventually get to school age. What then? The thought of school parties or him even staying the night with family utterly horrifies me. I have about a dozen nephews and neices. None of them would do anything to harm James just to be mean but accidents happen and some kids just don't understand NO. All of the other kids in my family have been given their space and were allowed to play without someone standing over them at all times. I feel like that is too dangerous at this point for James. Maybe it is a knee jerk reaction because we were just released from the hospital. I am so worried though that another little kid will give him chocolate and I won't realize it until it is too late. You can tell kids no but that doesn't always mean they won't do something. Nut allergies are common. Even dairy, gluten and egg allergies have become more common. I don't know any CHILDREN with chocolate allergies. Not only that but I also don't know another person outside of my son and I with rice allergies.
It has been a very stressful few days. It is just as bad as getting a diagnosis that you have a disease- or worse. We aren't sure where we are going from here and have another appointment next week. I know it isn't going to be easy but I am willing to do what ever it takes for Jamesy.
